How to make today a good day

A successful business colleague of mine always had a smile on his face. He was relaxed and happy with a spring in his step. He walked with his head held high displaying quiet confidence. His aura was fantastic for a man in his late sixties. I asked him how he managed it. He said that he didn’t boast about his successes or cry about his losses, he just made sure every day was a good day.

Although he was never a man to stand out from the crowd, he was a genuinely nice guy that became very wealthy from his successes. He had such a confidence about him that he didn’t have to boast his achievements or broadcast his future plans, he took every day as it come and just enjoyed the moment.

I understood that I could get results I so desperately wanted right now, if I focused on “the now” rather than worrying about tomorrow. I couldn’t influence tomorrow when today wasn’t the best it could be. I needed to focus on, my experience of today, because this moment “NOW” is the only true experience I will ever have. I found that making today a good day, then tomorrow an even better day, then next week even better, was the formulate for achieving results that lasted.

I spent too much time trying to perfect my future when my present wasn’t as good as it needed to be. So try it for yourself, changing just one element in your day today and see the rippling effect that it will have tomorrow. Create the foundations everyday for a better day tomorrow, then the day after.

http://www.changingoutcomes.co.uk/

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

Lessons in life - How to talk to strangers

Is this it?

For many years I had asked myself one question, which I could never answer. It was three words and eight letters, so simple to ask but for me a nightmare to answer, the question was “Is this it?” I was never satisfied I always wanted more.

My character forced me to push forward my in life, striving to be the best version that I could be. I placed huge amounts of pressure on myself to succeed, often feeling frustrated and let down, when things weren’t progressing as quickly as I had hoped. Many times outside influences would create obstacles and hamper my progress. I never took time to reflect whether I was content with what I had and where I was going, I was living my life at 100mph and focusing on the Holy Grail. It wasn’t until I began to accept that nothing in life is totally satisfactory, that nothing in life is perfect and that nothing in life is permanent, that I started to gain clarity.

When I realised the only guarantee in life is “Change” I started to accept the way things were at that moment in time, nothing remains the same. There are so many outside forces that can knock you off track, that even if you don’t want to change your life, your life will get changed for you. Also, there are so many positive influences that can give you a lucky break when you least expect it.

I changed my own question from “Is this it?” to “Is this enough for now?” and took the pressure off myself. I realised that I was striving for a perfect me in an imperfect world. Even if I hadn’t achieved what I wanted to, there was always another day to get there. Although we can influence how our life turns out, we have to question how much ultimate control we have on our destiny and whether we choose to accept how things are at any particular time.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

What makes you different?

I often meet business professionals from various industries and I’m fascinated to find out more about their company. Usually I prompt them with a leading question, “So what makes you different from your competitors?” in the hope of receiving an inspired and enthusiastic response. Many times I’m presented with a list of their services and they expect me to be impressed.

I’ve found a percentage of people truly believe their “Unique Selling Point” is way ahead of their competitors and if that is true I would be sorely disappointed  by the others following in their wake. What companies fail to recognise is the end users’ expectations and typically the trail blazers only match what the client expects. As a society we have become accepting of poor service as the norm and accept the excuses which are readily provided, as long as it’s cheap enough.

I recently spoke to a firm of solicitors who were proud of their personal service, their prompt responses and their success rate. When challenged “what makes them different” they were confident that they excelled in their industry, but as an end user I would expect these as a minimum starting point.

As a consumer we all end up choosing where to spend our hard earned cash, but our choices generally come down to a sterile process of who can supply a product or service “faster, better or cheaper” and we just accept all the shortfalls that go with the transaction. Usually these cost the company’s bottom line and often the suppler gets squeezed out of the market by decreasing profit margins because their ethos is money driven.

Surely the inspired companies that will win the business and stand the test of time are the ones that do genuinely exceed the customers’ expectations by adding value to the transaction rather than discounting their shortfalls. I believe that creating customer loyalty is never about money but more so about how you are different.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

What we say is what we get

I believe that we tend to talk our way into a state of mind on a daily basis just by the language we use. We get sucked into our environment and start to absorb the tone of other people, whether it’s relevant to us or not. Associating ourselves with either positive or negative people will have an influence on our mind-set, but we don’t have to accept what is forced upon us, we can make a difference.

One thing that did have a huge impact on my life was to change the language I used. Rather than saying something was good, I changed to say it was great. Rather than saying my day was okay, I changed to say it was brilliant. Just by changing the emotive words to carry a stronger emotional attachment, made me believe that it was true. Because I engulfed myself in stronger more positive feelings my mood changed for the better.

Alternatively if you tell yourself that something is bad enough times you believe yourself. The subconscious part of the brain can’t rationalise language, it tends to believe what it is told and drives our behaviour accordingly. The conscious part of the brain allows logic, how we interpret and process facts, but it is also influenced by our feelings. Therefore by purposely using more positive words, you can lift your mood and your subconscious brain believes it to be true, creating better behaviours and responses.

Factually the situations going on around me hadn’t changed, but my perception towards what was happening had. My chores became challenges and life seemed a little brighter because I was in control of my language. When negative things happened, they never felt so bad and I could cope with them far better.

Try it the next time you speak to someone and they ask how your day is. Rather than saying that your day is okay, tell them with enthusiasm how brilliant it is and watch their reaction. Generally people will influence the behaviour of others around them, so the words you use can be the catalyst for something better for you and other people.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

Will you be remember?

It's why you do it

Most business owners follow a similar pattern, trying to beat their competitors with a faster service or larger discounts, but either way it’s a huge business expense that doesn’t drive behaviour. To a degree, it may be cost effective in the short-term to buy customers but it’s not inspiring and it doesn’t create loyalty.

People don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it!!

To give you an example, why would you buy double-glazing from any company, it’s a very competitive industry with lots of competent companies. You are likely to commit yourself to making a purchase of several thousand pounds and need to leave a sizable deposit without knowing what the result will be like.

Most companies can offer a similar product, made to a similar standard and fitted just as well as their competitors. It becomes a sterile process of comparing prices, haggling for discounts and hoping as a consumer that you’ve made the right decision, it can become a matter of luck.

The inspired few companies out there don’t sell windows they tap directly into the emotional drivers that people want. They sell comfort and security; also they sell reliability and reassurance. These aren’t items on their price list, but are far more important to the end user than any sales pitch a keen representative can muster. People don’t buy what you do; they buy why you do it!! The focus should be, to match an emotional solution to an emotional problem, and for the end user to engage with the real reasons why you want to help them.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

When to make midlife choices

I have always been very ambitious, striving to make my family financially secure. I measured success with the size of my wage packet and the material things that I could buy. I wanted to be proud of my achievements and gain the respect of my peers. My prosperous retail career was founded on long and unsociable hours often working in excess of a 60 hour week. Over many years the situation became unsustainable and something had to break.

I reached a point in my life when I couldn't reconcile the huge golf between my successful career and the collateral damage left in my wake. My drive and ambition to secure a career had cost me dearly with my family life and left me feeling a total failure. When the phoenix rose from the ashes of my midlife crisis, I realised that I had midlife choices. I had an opportunity to change my hamster wheel lifestyle to something more meaningful.

Regardless of how long you have followed your path or invested in your future, you still have the choice to change if it no longer serves you. We start our plans with naïve optimism but gain valuable experience along the way. Often we become so fixated on the outcome, that we fail to recognise the impact on ourselves and our environment until the pain becomes unbearable. If you knew then what you know now, what would you have done differently?  

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

You get what you focus on

Posture affects our mood

I believe our body posture has a huge impact on our mood and how were interpret what is going on in our daily lives. Our positive or negative stance will ultimately determine the way we perceive information from the world around us. My own body posture has had a huge effect on my attitude and persona. A song that constantly plays through my mind until my subconscious brain believes it to be true, is a song from my childhood sung by Val Doonican called “Walk Tall”.

“Walk tall, walk straight and look the world right in the eye. That’s what my mama told me when I was about knee high. She said son be a proud man and hold your head up high. Walk tall, walk straight and look the world right in the eye”.

Whenever I stooped and hid my face, whenever I dropped my glaze and tried to get lost in the crowd, good old Val starts singing to me from his famous rocking chair. I realised that gravity wasn’t pulling me down, it was my lazy demeanour that was too comfortable and was creating the same effect on my mood.

Next time you read a book try to be mindful of your posture. Read a section hunched over the pages and then again with your head up and shoulders back. Although the words are the same it’s amazing how you will interpret the text in a different way. You will change your task from a chore to a pleasure and register the content more easily.

Now try the same thing when you talk to other people. Allow your back to straighten and forehead to lift. Pull your shoulders back and smile. There are so many books written on body language and posture, yet we all fail to adopt these techniques in our everyday life. Even when you talk to people on the telephone, your posture determines your tone and how others receive your message.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/

A challenge or a chore? It's the same task

Isn't it strange how one person sees a task as a chore, whereas someone else sees it as a challenge, yet it is the same task? Attitude controls our perception and installs our passion. It will either make us receptive or defensive.

We generally consider the word "attitude" to be a negative trait, but if you take attitude in the correct context, it can be a very powerful motivator to strive and achieve. Someone with a positive attitude will drive forward taking obstacles in their stride, creating opportunities and changing outcomes. Someone with a negative attitude can create barriers to be defensive and sabotage change. 

Naturally in our daily life we sit somewhere in the middle. Circumstances, stimuli and emotions, can all be factors that determine our attitude at any specific time. Being mindful that we have the power to affect our attitude, it will ultimately determine the outcome. It is interesting to consider that we can control our attitude rather than letting our attitude control us. Are we a passenger in our vehicle of life or are we the driver? The choice is yours.

I believe emotion to be a reactive state brought on by what has happened. Therefore attitude is our conscious effort to make something happen. It is proactive and within our control to change the future. Everyone must have a reason to do something, whether that to be through choice or necessity but attitude creates our passion and our desire.

 http://www.mikebowden.uk/

ChangingOutcomes.co.uk

Make time for what matters

Inspired Leaders, Creative Managers and You

Inspired leaders grow their business organically by sharing their belief. They hold their vision high so everyone can see what they stand for and share their passion to achieve the result. Inspired leaders spark our imagination and excite us to belong to something bigger than our own contribution. They influence the way that people feel and nurture their self-esteem.

Creative managers don’t need budgets to succeed, they think outside the box and utilise the resources they already have. They manage how people think, how people feel and how people behave. Creative managers are enthusiastic to challenge the status quo. They create a culture that is committed to a “common cause”.

I believe that success isn’t measured by profit, that’s just a tool to keep the process going. There is something bigger at play that inspires leaders and creates managers to flourish. I believe that taking ownership of “the purpose” is what we all strive for and the reason why we prosper. The aim to focus on the way that we feel and then harvest the rewards which are generated from that.

http://www.mikebowden.uk/